Victory is a path that few truly understand; being a man of color, gay and not of the Judeo-Christian faith cause society to stigmatize, judge and have hurdles being thrown at me due to ignorance. Thus, leading to forced isolation of sorts as an outcast not fitting into a title or sub group of society. Growing up I always felt different; even now I can recollect the strong emotions that impacted me. Sly comments of disgust from loved ones that targeted my non-masculine behavior and interest were ignorant and abusive on the mental level. All which made me feel less than, not worth life However, being a child all I could think of was how can I make my parents happy, even if it means betraying myself and who I really am. Psychological warfare was forced on me and now it will be what I overcome. For the manifestation of my victory I needed acceptance of self and self-discovery. All in all, this then led to me walking out my truth, my victory.

My path to Victory and freedom started about two years ago when I was kicked out by my mother and step-father house. According to the actions of my parents my impure desires and wanting’s, as they put it, was infectious and could corrupt innocents and spell my brothers into the same dark path.  So the one place I was supposed to have shelter from the world and have people who can encourage me I found the complete opposite all in the name of Jesus Christ. After that episode, I found myself by losing myself. I spent years dealing with subconscious trauma, depression and self-hatred. Finding comfort in researching religion, dogma and lies to follow my own spiritual path that then helped me see the beauty I had been given by my spiritual ancestors. I realized though my inward journey that I needed to accept all that I am. Loving myself for who I am, being able to look in the mirror and not project the hate that has been placed on me by family and to see my own projection of my true beauty. I began to accept and love my heritage and the tribes I come from, being a gay man of color and of native descent. The more I began to research the more I began to show more love, more self-respect. With meditation I took back my psyche that was clouded with lies and reigned victories over my being that seemed so foreign at one point in time. Once I finally brought balance to my vessel I was able to look in the mirror and forgive myself of all the trespasses against myself and my own moral code, promising to never allow anyone to reign over me again. Through the hard two years of inner and outer search of myself I manifested my victory over the shadows that have haunted me for so long, being master of my fate and path. Every day I walk out my truth, my victory knowing I have achieved true stability beyond the material. Victory to me is being able find who you are and who you are meant to be in a world where you’re told to keep and stay within the status quo.